Poker Counselor - Just Another Bad Beat Story
By John Carlisle

OK, I won't bore you with the details of my latest terribly bad beat. You've heard a million of the before. Personally, I am starting to find all of the crying about bad beats on online poker forums and chat rooms a yawn-inducing trend. Let me just say that a runner-runner suck-out kept me from winning an entry into a $5000 buy-in tournament. I won't lie; it hurt quite a bit even though I've done this all before.

I suppose that I should not be surprised that players are so very likely to spend their precious time re-telling stories of the "one that got away." Likewise, it isn't too surprising that not many of us are actually interested in hearing about other people's bad beats. You see, all human beings are naturally egocentric. Most of us in the US and Canada were raised in a culture which only helps to fuel this egocentricity. I'm not here to pass judgments or say that this mentality is morally wrong. In some respects, I'd guess that such an outlook is natural and unavoidable.

Because we are focused on "me" first and foremost, we simply can't help ourselves with telling bad beat stories. The bad beats strike us deep at our core, as we internalize the loss. Even though the cards have no personal vendetta against an individual player, it does seem that the infamous "poker gods" can be slanted against us at times. When the cards fall against us, we essentially look for the answer to on vital question: "Why me?" It is as if we expect the cards to know who they are dropping against. We like to think that certain people do not deserve such poor luck. From my experience, it seems that nobody thinks that they, themselves, deserve a bad beat.

We've all experienced the scenario, I'm sure. Perhaps a few heart wrenching one-outers have hit against you on the River. If you watch the No-Limit tournament coverage on television, I'm sure that you've witnessed it as well. Mike Madisow and Phil Hellmuth are often profiled as their emotions boil after a bad beat. When I talked with Phil during a break from his duties as an UltimateBet.com spokesperson, he was not apologetic for showing his emotionality. "Hey, I'm passionate," Phil admits. "I'm a passionate person. I can bear-down when I have to, but I like playing with joy. I like playing with passion. I love the game."

Phil says it very well. Indeed, most of us do love the game. That deep sense of love is what causes the bad beats to hurt so badly. Essentially, we feel personally betrayed by our poker "love" when we get hit with a bad beat. Like a scorned lover, our negative emotions will undoubtedly explode within us. We "should have" won the pot. We did not "deserve" to lose. Without any other viable option to expel the anger and frustration, we turn to the chat forums or call our poker buddies to tell the tales of terror. I suppose that this means that bad beat stories are not going away. We should only expect them to get more prolific as more players begin to feel passionate about the game. Go ahead and tell us your story, if it helps you feel better. Then get back to the table and get ready to face the next challenge. Although your next bad beat may be just one deal away, we all know you will be back for more. Now go make it happen.

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In addition to being a poker enthusiast, gambling columnist, and lecturer, John is a National Certified Counselor (NCC). He has a Master of Arts degree in Counseling from West Virginia University, and a Bachelor's degree in Psychology with a minor in Sociology from Lock Haven University. You can arrange for interviews or speaking engagements with "the Poker Counselor" at carlisle14@hotmail.com.